517 Magazine Days of Giveaways

For Pete's Take: Mixing Metaphors

There’s lots of things our “significant others” bring to our relationships that make us smile and glad they’re in our life. For me, it’s …

There’s lots of things our “significant others” bring to our relationships that make us smile and glad they’re in our life. For me, it’s the little things Brenda does that make me smile. The way she wages a one woman “war against the bugs eating her roses.” Or, how she sings when she mows our lawn. I call it Karaoke lawn mowing, but whatever it is, she and Rihanna get our lawn done in no time.
The list goes on but the single most endearing, charming and downright funniest thing my wife does is mix her metaphors.
She doesn’t throw people “under” the bus; she throws them “on” the bus.
It’s not the pot calling the “kettle black;” it’s the pot calling the “copper kettle.”
It’s not “one” for the road it’s; “two” for the road. Okay, that last one was mine, but who’s counting?
Anyway, you get where I’m coming from. It’s hard to keep a straight face when she’s trying to make a point and finishes it with “do you catch my draft?”
It somewhat runs in the family. One time, when my son was 7 years old I had to have a “talk” with him about some missing schoolwork he didn’t turn into his teacher. After I gave an impassioned lecture about why schoolwork was important and he listened to the options he had in talking with his teacher the next day, I ended my little counseling session with; “I’ve given you a lot to think about Gage, you better sleep on it and we’ll talk in the morning to see what you’ve come up with.” He looked at me with an expression of confusion and bewilderment, his face screwed up in a twisted knot.
I asked him what the problem was? His reply was; “How can I think about it if I’m supposed to sleep on it?” My first reaction to this question was; is he playing me? Is this little snot-nosed kid pulling my leg? It was then that the first signs of my right brain, analytical son shone through. Or, as Brenda would say; “an apple a day doesn’t fall from the tree.”
So, whatever the things are that the love of your life does to make you smile, she’s got a list for you as well. Remember, people who live in glass houses shouldn’t open up a can of worms.


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